My encounter with change; the only constant.

My encounter with change; the only constant.

Change is the only constant.
Everyone and everything goes through a change or hundreds.
While I thought I was successfully avoiding it for many years,it did catch up with me eventually. I gasped and groaned then let it pass through me tearing and whisking away the skin I had to shed. The time had come. It was my turn and I was little over voting age still slightly hangover from believing I knew everything.
Ah ignorance truly is bliss.
But the most insane thing about change or its fancier and intelligent cousin ‘evolve’ is that they hit you most when you don’t feel it.

You don’t realize they are working on you until it’s too late, often when they are done.

The stubborn minds wages war, the heart flustered paces back and forth in confusion.

However the beauty of it all is when the storm has passed. Its ruffled a few feathers on its way yet you approach with friendship. You make baby steps not-so confidently. The time for change has come and gone leaving you bewildered in the course.

Your intellect fathoms whats come over you, tears at the forgotten you.
And with the flowing tears does enlightenment come. You realize the new you. You hold out your hand in self-doubt. You try to embrace it with arms open yet your heart panics in silent. You hug it tightly. You are in certitude but you can go on.

And that’s how one day you realize you’ve grown up…

This is the cycle that has no halt, it traps you and many others once or often as it marches around while the earth takes its laps around the sun.


FIND ME ON:

FACEBOOK: HTTPS://WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/CHOCOLATEFROSST

TWITTER :HTTPS://TWITTER.COM/CHOCOLATEFROSST

INSTAGRAM: HTTP://INSTAGRAM.COM/CHOCOLATEFROSST

Advertisements
6 Signs That Show You Have Reached Adulthood!

6 Signs That Show You Have Reached Adulthood!

Its been months since I officially became an adult and/or of legal age all around the globe. However, this adulthood thing just doesn’t arrive in a ribbon tied package early morning on your 21st birthday and therefore you hardly know when it’s arrived (mostly because we have our nose stuck up in fairy world). Therefore we all kind of need to take the time out to sit back ponder whether we are an adult yet.

So I decided since I am here all grown up and all (pshffft! 😉 )  I’m going to make life a tad bit easier and list down the 6 signs that I feel tells us that adulthood has arrived! Read more

Life in the Intermediary

Life in the Intermediary

20140708-120500-43500567.jpg

Something awakens my conscious in the background, I toss and turn trying to shut it out. I reach out to the buzzing phone in a mid-state between life and death, the brain manages to recognize Read more

Cherry Picking and a River Bank Picnic!

Cherry Picking and a River Bank Picnic!

This weekend was family time entangled with an overdose of nature. It dazzles how nature beat any so-called man-made structures any day with its breathtaking beauty. We visited a very suburban part of Japan in the Yamanashi Prefecture where there were cherry farms were found. We pay per person and get to eat any amount of cherries that we pick.

We did some cherry picking, eating and gloating until we were too fruitfully full to go on.It was quite interesting. 20140614-173356-63236156.jpg I found a red cherry! 🙂

Read more

It’s a quest and it’s worth it!

It’s a quest and it’s worth it!

A thought has been loitering in my brain for the past few days on how important it is to ‘find yourself’. Although it is a term that caught my eye while skimming through my anthropology readings (don’t ask me why I need to learn anthropology to major in business because that’s a mystery I am still trying to solve), it’s a thought that’s been filling my mind even before I read that(more like glanced at it) and the reading merely gave me a term to associate my thought with. I look back at myself and realize perhaps the only part of me that is similar to the I that exist today is the fact that I’ve been trying very hard to find myself…always. I’ve sat back and wondered my reason, my existence and my importance. There has been one thing I’ve always really wanted is to always be smart and never be stupid. The funny part is I didn’t realize that wont be so easy and life does have its ways of telling you that. Just yesterday I sat through staring at the fourth ‘C’ I received for that one class I have been slaving off for months, the stress I’ve had is beyond words and the stress that lies on my head right now is unexplainable. I’ve been feeling stupid, for quite an extended period, feeling down and at times worthless. While all this drama happens, the voices in my head is trying to make itself heard, trying to tell me something I am trying way too hard to decipher. Theres so many dilemmas and I am at that phase in life where I am not sure what I want out of myself. I try to analyze me, judge me but then I fight myself not to every time remembering how much I have discovered and understood myself. I’ve broaden my horizons from what they used to be (a pipe line i guess) and one thing I know for sure is that I don’t know what I want to do in life. Gosh…dont tell me im the only senior in college who thinks that please…like pretty please… 😛

20140414-185402.jpg

Read more

Food I have come to love!

Food I have come to love!

I have always been a super picky eater. I don’t fuss but I just don’t eat anything I don’t want to. Sounds fair enough right.

I love burgers and they are my ultimate food love! But coming to Japan has exposed me to so many cuisines and few of them have become my favorites. And I have been turning myself from all the junk love to a rather subtle selection of somewhat healthy stuff.  Heres my Top 5 favorite food list : ( apart from the burgers and buns! )

1. Mexican

via Wikimedia commons licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license.

Be it the Burritos, the tacos or just plain guacamole with crackers! I love them alll! I believe everyone just should try them love them!  And since i usually take vegetarian, it always feels healthy. And I realized I don’t have a picture of any Mexican food because im too busy eating them and never remember to click one…do you see the love through that point I just tried to make ? And the nail in the picture above is really bothering me and I can’t find a better licensed picture to replace it with. *sigh*

2. Salad

20140303-155912.jpg

Yeah… I love them. The cabbages, the corn, the broccoli ,the purple leaves, all of them! With the dressing please! It’s almost funny how I hated vegetables and always felt like I’m transforming into a rabbit while I ate them 😉

Confession: I do go to some restaurants just for the salad in their lunch menu 😀

3.  Humus with Pita bread

Via Wikimedia Commons under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license.

Its perfect! They are the best combo ever especially if the bread is good and you can find some fresh olives. I love them and I’ve seriously forced people (including my parents) to try it and love it the same way that I do.

4. Japanese

20140306-200332.jpg20140330-191321.jpg

Ok so this was the biggest unexpected choice. I wasn’t a huge fan or so I thought until I was craving for Japanese rice with fried prawns and vegetables (and sauce) or when I started enjoying my onigiri (rice ball with filling) for the seaweed wrapper. Lets just say I’m proud of myself for this one! Even the noodles are like good. However, my favorites in the Japanese cuisine is very very limited.

5. Mushroom and Onion Pizza with olive oil poured on it (Yes… now breathe)

20140406-191401.jpg

How could you like anything with mushroom and onion with it? That used to be my reaction too. But then things changed when I found this pizza *picture above*. And now I can literally eat it everyday and still love it the same way.

So the point I’m trying to make is… mostly to myself… my taste buds have decided to go GREEN. Some CSR planning my brain has adopted. 🙂

A state of mind

A state of mind

The country is sprinkled with pink candy floss, such prettiness it is. Mother nature once again reminds you, beauty starts from her.I sit in class fidgeting my way through the hour. Work weighs me down, the stress hurt my head and weakness battles to dominate me. I sigh not knowing if its another one of those spring flus or just the workload tiring me out, either way, it does not matter, nothing changes and definitely not those wretched deadline.

20140401-154051.jpg

When your gliding through that phase in life, where on one hand your trying very hard to graduate and then on the other hand you really don’t know what to with life after you actually graduate. The unknown haunts for sure. 🙂

I have been really thinking about something for awhile now, in that deep, philosophical like way. I have been dissecting what ‘Happiness’ is. It is perhaps the most underrated thing on earth. More a state of mind than an emotion, more the ultimate search than just a phase. Its absolute bliss to be in a state of happiness. Despite the stress, despite the worries and despite almost everything, you are happy. And that’s an amazing feeling.

Look at it like this, when you are in the ‘happy’ state of mind, you can deal with all the worries and all the stress, but you are still happy. Let me personalize it further for understanding, the state of mind is your desktop but all your emotions are little files that you tap into once in awhile. But your state of is what makes really matters at the end. Happiness is like beautiful, you get to wake up feeling good, you can smile without barriers and laugh your heart out. The worries don’t seem too much nor does the stress, so like I have emphasized in a zillion ways…there nothing better than being happy. Now what makes you happy is an entirely different question to ponder upon 😉 .

What do you think? Is happiness just an emotion or a state of mind? Leave your thoughts below 🙂

 

That’s just how my lego works!!

That’s just how my lego works!!

20140320-191029.jpg

I watch as the puzzle pieces fall into place. Fascinated by the forming story.My thoughts walk deep into it but is soon distracted by my quirky ways of focus. My legos just work that way,please comprehend. I topple, trip and with a doze of wackiness I crawl towards my destination. My pace,my ways and my convenience, thats just how my lego works. Im not the hare nor am I the turtle, i’m just being me. Simple and original.Inspired my many, but its conviction thats vital to make the path thats yours to own, to boast, to gloat.

Sleep engulfs, hunger fights and so does the greed to want. Thats the most human way. While the sunsets, a day bids goodbye and hope returns, offering a tomorrow. Another day that hands you the torch, to decide your fate in its light. I sit slouching with all the faith stored safely to ponder upon tomorrow. But of course I’m distracted, by the moment, the flowing rain drops, the golden rays, the colorful nature, the concrete world….

Calculative is what I define myself as. “You mean ‘risk-averse’? ,”they ask. A question that induces so much more questions to awake within me. The many scenarios of outcomes that run in your mind before every decision just like the possibility trees that appear in the global operations class. Mathematical I am. Calculative I am. Global and operative I am. Convinced I remain…And that’s just how my lego works.

The human being…a creation so unique and so complex makes me ponder. So much like a jack-in-the-box kind of spring… The more you compress, the more rapidly it returns back to its original ways.

Perhaps finding yourself, learning yourself and understanding yourself helps you know your world a little bit more. After all, your world begins with the little lego piece called YOU! 🙂

The Streets of Tokyo

The Streets of Tokyo

20140303-184317.jpg

A life of conviction and a desire to have it all sorted perhaps describes me best. A fading desire to attain perfection, I have now begun embracing myself for its flaws. I love with no boundaries and hate with equal passion. With concrete foot I walked down the streets of Tokyo while it taught me life.

If my dad could travel across seas leaving me behind to wait his return, I knew it had to be somewhere special. I cherished that land for being my equal and longed to breathe its air. Years passed by and I did my research. A globe full of nations but my fascination rested where the sun rises first. No real reason, not even the flowers nor the tall mountains. It was a promise an infant had made. It was a love that answered no why. It was dream to walk down the streets of Tokyo.

Leaving my safe nest I held my fears tight, I flew across the oceans to walk the streets of Tokyo. I had it all sorted. I was letting go of the hands that guided me all my life. Not forever, just 3 years I told myself. I had dreamed and I knew I had to live it. Concerned eyes looked at me. With conviction I told them I can do this. I didn’t know how but I pushed that deep behind my mind. I was determined to live my dream. Not let the cynical eyes break me nor the fear of making a new trail cripple me. Just three years I promised myself and my nest that sat distance away. Ill be back ! I claimed to all unaware of the future destined for me. Unaware of the lessons lined up for me. Ignorant of the course of change i would be walking along in the years to come.

Stepping into the bliss of living in my dream, I started my life walking down the streets of Tokyo. With innocence or rather ignorance I entered the foot steps of the building where my dream awaited me. Perhaps you would never know anyone who loved being dependent and pampered as I did. I had no interest in rebelling. I had no reason to. I was always a happy child who had a beautiful life. Protected from the bad and directed towards the right. I had a dream, a passion and a life.

However, I look back at that girl wondering what happened. She’s a stranger. I do not remember her anymore. Who was she? Was she right? or just naive?! Then I remember it doesn’t matter. She’s gone. And she’s never coming back.

Today, I have evolved. Priorities changed. You can call my resistance to change a manufacturing defect. Thus it took me a year or two to stop yearning for the dependency I was so familiar with. To know that it was me against the world. Thats how it shall remain. To process, it seemed difficult but I came through. Walking through the streets of Tokyo I saw life in its larger scale. A new perspective; not from the little box I lived in nor from them who dared not dream. A perspective that thought me to appreciate life for its smallest givings. I slowly and steadily became independent. Or how i see it; I have become completely dependent on myself. It was not what I wanted, but thats how it became… And the funny part is, I like it this way.

The streets of Tokyo has walked with me through my lessons. Its sun shining bright at me while I laughed in Joy. Its breeze wiping away when the tears fell down. The fog hugging me when I walked with pride. The noise disturbing me when everything was too overwhelming to handle. The seats at Saizeriya, the mochas at Starbucks have witnessed my stories. Nothing too great, just my story. The streets of Tokyo taught me to handle myself, to face my fears. This life isn’t forever. It taught me to dream more, to achieve , to live.

“I want to be around people that do things. I don’t want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people who dream, and support and do things” – Amy Poehler

I want. I want to never leave the streets of Tokyo. I want to remain where life is busy. I want to be surrounded by people who have a life, a dream to achieve. Not the ones who exist for no real reason except perhaps to judge. I want to remain happy. I want to make my own mistakes.Not suffer for the ones others make. I want to reach the star, I will at least land on a coconut tree 😉

The streets of Tokyo taught me calmness. To filter my rage. To comprehend the being I was. Thoughts fly, I want yell out loud. Blame it all on another’s miscalculation for the fallen tears.  Disappointment at the rescue team that never came engulfed me. My intelligence laughed at me. A rescue team? It sneered.’ You have to fight your own battles’ I learned walking down the streets of Tokyo. My books, my classes always have remained my comfort. Holding them tight, I stood in conviction, to dream.

Enough knowledge I gathered, to know I knew nothing. Its a start I guess. But I desire to achieve. The silence at the top attracts me. It makes me feel real. I can pamper myself I know. I can I know. My attention is something that never leaves, and that I love. Power and intelligence has always attracted me. I have embraced my change, my flaws. I love the distance. I expect the most out of me and the least of others. Its nice like that.

I want to be the streets of Tokyo; busy, enchanting. Its not an infants wish anymore. Its a intoxicating affection based on reliability. If home is where you feel the most safest ; then I shall call Tokyo home. If home is where you feel you belong: I shall call Tokyo home then.

And like what Walt Disney once said:

“If you can dream it, you can do it”

So with determination to dream more, live life. And have the streets of Tokyo guiding me through it all! 🙂